christianity

TRUST THE PROCESS

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Have you ever felt like others have life figured out while you are still struggling? You feel like some sort of instruction manual must have been passed out at adulthood and you missed that line. Or maybe you just generally feel behind in life. You feel you should be further along. You look at your peers and feel like they are succeeding and progressing in life while you feel stuck. I’m here to tell you that this is more common than you think. Feeling off track or experiencing failure in life is not the exception. So many people feel this way. We often just don’t see the behind the scenes work it took someone to get to where they are today. And what if these failures and side tracks are not detours from your path, but rather the path itself?

Y’all, lately I have felt stuck. Just waiting in a holding pattern to execute our move. (We will be moving from Austin, Texas to the Pacific Northwest next spring!) But I am trying to reframe this time of life as part of my path that I need to be on. I fully recognize that the struggles, setbacks, and “wasted” seasons are often building something in us that we will need later. As I look back over my life and evaluate the hardships and failures I have endured, I also see the strength of character that was built in me through those experiences. Since I am currently kind of obsessed with gym life, I will use the analogy of growing muscle. In order to build muscle, it must be broken down first. As you lift weights it stresses those muscles fibers and actually breaks them down so they can get stronger and grow. And being all in on gym life, I can tell you that this is a very slow process! It does not happen overnight and it may take years to get to where you want. I also want to share a Bible verse that has encouraged me when it comes to trials in life. It is in James 1, verses 2-4 “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” This reminds me to reframe the trials of this life as something that is producing perseverance which ultimately will help me to grow.


I think one of the biggest reasons we question where we are in life when we feel behind or have experienced failure is because we compare ourselves to the journey others are on. I think this has become much more prevalent with the origin of social media and how pervasive it has become in our lives. Often we are comparing our behind the scenes to someone’s highlight reel. In addition to that, I truly believe that we are all on our own unique journey. Everyone’s timeline, lessons, and path are different. Someone else being “ahead” in your eyes says nothing about your own pace and purpose. So trust the process! Instead of saying to yourself: “Why am I behind?” reframe this with “What is this preparing me for?” Replace your thought: “Why do they have it (whatever you want that you see someone else have)?” with “This is my own unique path, not theirs.” Another Bible verse that is encouraging with regards to this topic of comparison comes from Galatians 6:4-5, “Each one should test their own actions. Then they can take pride in themselves alone, without comparing themselves to someone else, for each one should carry their own load.” We really weren’t designed to be exposed to so many people’s lives, but because of social media we see all kinds of people’s lives, creating more opportunities for comparison. But if we take the advice of this Bible passage, we must focus on our own journey.

I know all of this is not easy. Particularly if you are currently in a difficult season of life. But what if the thing you are going through right now isn’t a set back, but instead a set up? Focus on what you are learning in this season, and think about what it might be setting you up for! Which could give you the hope for the future you need right now. Can you think of something specific that you could do today if you are in a season of feeling stuck or set back? Perhaps you could journal about what this season is teaching you, or you could let go of comparison by saying (maybe even out loud) when you are comparing yourself to someone: “I am on my own unique and beautiful path and it’s okay it’s not like theirs.” Or maybe even unfollow those who make you feel discouraged. Even in a season of stagnation or failure, we can look for the silver linings and enjoy each moment of our lives. All we have is the present! When we focus on the past we feel regret, when we focus on the future we feel anxious. Focus on what is right in front of you today and view each day as a blessing! Because no matter where you are in life, if you woke up and are breathing, that is a blessing!

This is the YouTube video I shared in conjunction with this blog post.

TRUSTING GOD WHEN IT’S HARD

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Okay friends, for this week’s Thoughtful Thursday post (which is going up on Friday this week!) I wanted to talk about trusting God when it’s hard. Or trusting God when our circumstances don’t make sense or are difficult. The first thing I am going to say about this is that it is not easy. I don’t have three neat steps to trust God when it’s hard. I think what makes trusting difficult usually has to do with timing. We think God should do something to change our circumstances on our timeline and so we feel discouraged.

From my experience, I have seen how God has used the in between, the waiting, to help me to grow. I needed the circumstances, which seemed so difficult or painful at the time, to help me to grow as a person. To help me to gain more self awareness, to help me grow in patience, to help me grow in perseverance. All of this is not easy. As humans, we naturally want things to be comfortable. We want things to go our way and in our time. But I think if all of that were true we would not grow and evolve. There is a quote I once heard by Robin Sharma, “Rough seas make stronger sailors. Tough times build greater people.”

I think it is important when we are in a period of waiting for God to answer our prayers or waiting for God to intervene in our difficult circumstances to shift our perspective. It is easy to feel sorry for ourselves and focus on how our circumstances aren’t fair. But what if instead of focusing on the negative, we asked ourselves “what lesson is there for me to learn in this difficult season.” I can almost guarantee you that when waters are rough, the sailor is learning a lot about sailing!

One perspective that I like to remind myself of when I am in a difficult season in life is that I cannot see the big picture. I am in one season of life, which may be short, relatively speaking compared to the rest of my life. God sees that big picture and knows what we need in each season of life. The difficulties today may be preparing us for our future. I recognize that this idea doesn’t resonate with everyone, but even if you don’t believe in God, there is a big picture happening and you are in one part of your timeline and can’t see the big picture.

I can assure you, because I have lived enough life, that the hard seasons we go through are not in vain. From my experience, it has been in those difficult seasons that I have grown, not just in general as a person but also in my faith! When I look back, I see what God was doing in those times when I felt impatient and frustrated with life. Because of this experience, it is easier for me to keep that positive attitude and keep trusting that God has a plan for my life. There are two comforting Bible verses when it comes to this topic. The first is Jeremiah 29:11, which says “‘For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope for the future.’” The second verse is Romans 8:28 which says, “All things work together for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose.”

I do want to say, I by no means want to minimize any difficult life circumstances you might be going through right now. I have chosen not to share publicly some of the things I have gone through in my life, but believe me I have gone through some pretty tough things. If you are going through a difficult time right now and need prayer, you can let me know down in the comments and I will pray for you. If you don’t feel comfortable sharing publicly, you can just ask for general prayer, or message me over on Instagram. I will pray for you!

This is the YouTube video I shared in conjunction with this blog post.

FIX YOUR EYES ON THE RIGHT THING

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Okay friends, for today’s Thoughtful Thursday I wanted to talk about a quote I shared over on Instagram earlier this week. The quote says, “sometimes one landmark helps us find our way when we are lost. Even though our location hasn’t changed, things become clear when we fix our eyes on the right thing.” How many of you out there are landmark direction givers? Don’t tell me to turn east here, and then south there! Tell me to turn right by the gas station and left by the Starbucks! It’s so much easier to find your way or remember a route by landmarks.

When we feel lost in life, it is easy to feel overwhelmed. Feeling lost is something I think everyone has felt at some point in life. It can happen after a setback, after a big life change, or even in the middle of success. The things that once gave us a sense of purpose and direction may start to fade, and we are left asking ourselves, what now? When we feel this way, the instinct may be to search frantically for clarity. Just like when you are physically lost you may feel frantic to find something, anything, to grab onto that will guide you back. But the truth is, what if when you feel lost the challenge isn’t to immediately find answers, but instead to just focus on the right things and the answers will emerge organically.

When confusion takes over, we often begin to obsess over what’s missing, what went wrong, or what others seem to have figured out that we don’t. But when we focus on the things that are outside of our control, this only makes us feel more disoriented. The first step to finding your way again is to shift your focus inward – to what you can control. That includes your mindset, your effort, and your willingness to keep moving forward even when the path ahead of you isn’t completely clear.

As a Christian, I find that seeking God through reading the Bible and prayer can help to ground me. Spending time daily with God is non-negotiable for me. The Bible is like a compass for me, and I know if I follow what God instructs in His word then I am on the right track. As I seek God, I find over and over again that the “right thing” really is quite simple: it’s to do the next right thing. Often when we feel lost it is because we are focusing too much on the whole journey or the big picture. Doing the next right thing can really keep you grounded. It could just be the seemingly insignificant daily healthy habits that we can lean into during a time of uncertainty. Like taking care of your body – exercising, eating healthy, and getting good sleep, connecting with friends and loved ones, or returning to or picking up a hobby that could bring joy to your life. These may seem simple or mundane, but these daily habits can provide momentum and lead to some clarity in the long run.

 Perhaps you are not a Christian and the idea of the Bible or prayer doesn’t resonate with you. But even if you don’t have that as a compass, you do have the things you value in life and priorities, which can help serve as a map towards clarity. When you’re lost, it can be easy to confuse direction with identity, but they aren’t the same. You can lose your way without losing yourself. Reflecting on what truly matters can keep you on the course towards clarity – like kindness, honesty, curiosity, compassion, love, or any other thing that you value. When you are living out those values it can keep that momentum going.

In a culture that glorifies constant productivity and certainty in purpose, it can be easy to feel like being lost is a failure. But more likely being lost it is an invitation in life to slow down and listen. Sometimes the right focus is not doing more, but instead being more present. The fog will begin to lift, maybe slowly, maybe VERY slowly, but not because you force it, but because you stop chasing every distraction and learn to trust that clarity will come when you are ready for it!