For today’s Thoughtful Thursday post I wanted to talk about aging gracefully. I wanted to share on this topic because I know a lot of people are surprised when they find out my age. For those of you who are new here or just don’t know, I am 50 years old. Aging gracefully is not just about creams and ointments, exercise, drinking plenty of water, and getting good sleep. Don’t get me wrong, I think all of those healthy habits contribute to aging gracefully, but it is far more than just surface level habits.

The first thing I wanted to talk about is relationships. I’m talking about genuine relationships. Those relationships where you have deep and meaningful conversations, hard conversations, remembering birthdays and other special dates, and showing care and love for one another. Dr. Mark Hyman has shared on this topic, the importance of relationships for health and longevity. On instagram he shared that if you have a loving, connected conversation with someone, it will turn on the genes that shut off inflammation in the body. He also shared “an 85 year old study following 700+ people found that the #1 predictor of long-term health and happiness wasn’t diet, wealth, or even genetics. It was the quality of relationships. Community is really the ultimate medicine for the body and brain.” This isn’t easy. Especially in this fast paced culture we live in. It is difficult to prioritize relationships, but it will help us to age gracefully! 

Something else that can help us to age gracefully is similar to prioritizing relationships is to look outward instead of inward. When we focus on listening to others, helping others, serving others instead of constantly focusing on ourselves and our own needs, we shine a little brighter!

We also must hold on to curiosity if we want to age gracefully. Have you heard that phrase, “he or she is set in their ways.” This is usually referring to someone who is older and has become closed-minded. Staying open-minded and curious can help us to stay more youthful. We can do this by listening to others’ perspectives and opinions, but we can also do this by being life-long learners, challenging and examining our own beliefs. Prioritizing education throughout your life will help you to age gracefully!

The next thing I have to share I would say is totally underrated. I think it is so important to hold onto whimsy. Typically, whimsy is something that is associated with children. Kids have an excitement and enthusiasm for life that is often lost in adulthood. Finding joy in the little things in life can help us to stay youthful! Look for ways to make life playful! Go play in the rain, skip into a store instead of walking, stop and ride on a swing when you pass one! Don’t lose your wonder for life! Make room for fun and laughter.  Don’t run yourself ragged saying yes to everything, but instead be intentional with your “yes.” Say yes to spontaneous adventures. Play isn’t pointless, you can get excited about things that aren’t necessarily useful or productive.

Another way you can age gracefully is by being gentle with yourself. Give yourself grace because no one is perfect. We all just do our best and if we have unattainable standards for ourselves, it will make us irritable and frustrated. I recognize that this is easier said than done and can take time to get there through practice! This shift is not something that can be bottled up and sold, but it definitely changes your demeanor, the way you carry yourself. Similarly, stop “should-ing” yourself. It’s okay to want to make changes in life and want to challenge yourself to do better, but don’t put unreasonable expectations on yourself. Self compassion softens you. You unfurl your brow, you lower your shoulders. This ease with yourself shines through and helps you to age gracefully.

You know what else softens you? Doing the inner work: processing your emotions, feeling them instead of fixing, denying, or covering them. Once you do this work, you relax physically – your shoulders lower, your jaw unclenches, your gut is at peace. You aren’t in a constant state of fight or flight and needing to protect yourself. In general, doing the hard thing over and over helps you to age gracefully. I’m not talking just about things that are physically hard like exercise and eating healthy, although those things are good! I’m talking about being emotionally honest with yourself, I’m talking about getting out of bed every morning when you don’t want to (or even have to). I’m talking about leaning into your healthy habits even when life circumstances start spiraling.

Something else that I have found to be so important is to prioritize rest. Making time for rest is not being lazy. Rest gives your body time to repair. Your physical body, but also your mind and your emotions. When you prioritize rest, you must be intentional with your time. A couple years ago I felt like God was calling me to take a true sabbath. I was working 7 days a week and often felt exhausted or burnt out. Now that I take Sundays off from working, I must be intentional with the other 6 days.

Even though I wanted to focus on things other than the obvious things that will help us age gracefully, let’s talk about exercise. When you age gracefully you learn to shift the focus from a certain body size to exercise for your mental health, appreciating the fact that your body can move. This is certainly not easy as we are undoing decades of programming from society. But this mindset shift is so important and honestly just freeing! No longer exercising because we ate a piece of cake or because we want to fit in a certain size of jeans, and instead habitually moving your body because it makes you stronger and more energized! When you learn to move with your body instead of against it you unlock a freedom you have not known!

Lastly, aging gracefully comes from living with integrity, heart, and contentment. When your actions and habits are in alignment with your values and priorities, you show up in this world in a different kind of way. You shine brightly because you are living in freedom. This kind of peace slows down the aging process!