pursuing minimalism

FEELING LOST

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Okay friends, I think I have said this before but this was another one of those weeks that I was really struggling to know exactly what I wanted to share. I have several topic ideas simmering, but I feel like I just can’t flesh them out right now. And honestly, it may relate to what I have been feeling lately, and the topic I wanted to talk about today. For a lack of a better way to describe it I have been feeling lost lately. I’m in a weird life stage right now where I have adult children, but two of the three of them still live with us. We are honestly in a bit of a standstill in life right now, and maybe that is making me feel lost? We have talked about downsizing before, but without sharing a bunch of details about our situation, we have decided it is best to stay in the home we are currently in. It’s just not the right timing yet. Not to mention it financially makes sense to stay in our home because of the interest rates!

Everyone has a different “mid-life” experience. {{I don’t want to call it a mid-life crisis because I don’t like that term!}} Maybe I feel extra lost because I never really had a career that I developed since my focus was on raising my kids and taking care of our home. I did have a couple of part time jobs, and I also worked with non for profit organizations when my kids were younger, and then I ran my own business as a professional organizer for a few years. I’ve always kept busy but nothing consistent or cohesive, so now I’m in this phase of trying to figure out what I’m doing with my life and career.

In addition to feeling a little lost as far as my career, I think there are a lot of things that happen in this stage of life that people don’t talk about. Understandably so as it is difficult and painful things, and quite honestly hard to articulate the feelings around it. I am at the age where my kids are moving out or just getting older and moving towards leaving home and it’s hard to have a different family dynamic as they age. There are a lot of wonderful things about having adult children, but it does take getting used to parenting them in a different way as they turn into young adults. This is also the age where our parents begin to decline in health as they begin to age and you are really faced with the reality of their mortality. I did lose my biological father back in 2020, but I’m thankful that my mom and stepdad are still in fairly good health, and we have longevity on that side of the family as my grandfather turns 98 this month! But my husband’s parents are declining, so that reality has hit hard.

During this life phase it is easy to feel regret about everything you didn’t do with your life leading up to this point. It’s important to focus on the positive and remember all the things you did right. Also, I frequently remind myself – like I would a friend – that if I’m worried I didn’t do enough, then I probably was a good parent because I care enough to worry! 

I think for me personally, all of these feelings are coming up because one of our kids will be moving – not just out of the house, but across the country to the pacific northwest in less than a month! Big life changes like this cause us to evaluate our lives and decide if we want or need to make some changes. And honestly, this is also triggering my anxiety. If you have been around a while then you might have heard me talk about my struggles with anxiety. When I was in my mid 30’s I was actually diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder. While I have learned a lot of ways to manage it on my own without medication, there are life circumstances that can trigger it. I think I have been decluttering more around my home lately as part of a coping mechanism. I have more to say on that topic, but I will save that for another Thoughtful Thursday!

Since I was really struggling to know what to share, I thought I would just share with you what has actually been on my mind lately. I hope that this resonated with someone or made someone feel not as alone today. If you are going through life transitions – whatever they might be – I am sending you a big hug today!

The YouTube video I made in conjunction with this blog post.

FINDING BALANCE IN LIFE

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Okay friends, for today’s Thoughtful Thursday post I wanted to talk about something that keeps coming up lately in my conversations with friends, and that is balance. I tend to be an all or nothing person. I either won’t commit to something, or I commit 110%! It can be difficult for me to have balance in my life. Part of being someone who is an all or nothing type is being extremely disciplined and loyal to whatever we are committed to, probably to a fault. Sometimes we may do things out of obligation or sheer fortitude instead of having our heart and soul into it. We may end up being legalistic in what we are committed to, and just go through the motions instead of living in a present way.

I am learning that I don’t need to adhere to these strict set of arbitrary rules I place on myself. I’m learning to balance following a schedule and having routines, but also having some freedom and flexibility in that schedule. I’m learning the importance of listening to my intuition more and to stop being such a stickler about following my to-do lists. The other day I received two phone calls from two different friends who needed to talk to me. In the past I might have hesitated to answer the phone call no matter what, because I look at my to-do list and tell myself I don’t have time for this phone call that was not on my schedule for the day. But, I knew the circumstances of both of these friends and the things they were going through and I knew it was more important for me to set aside my to-do list to have those conversations.

Another example from this week: I used to be the type of person who went to church every Sunday without question, but now I listen to what my body or my soul needs and I follow that. Last Sunday I really felt like I needed time out in nature in the morning. I live in Texas, and if you want to get out in nature in the summer it pretty much needs to be in the morning! While I was in nature I got a phone call from a friend inviting me to go with them to their church (a service that was later in the morning than I usually go.) I felt like it reaffirmed my intuition to not go to my own church that day. My friend needed me with them at their church.

One thing I’m learning about balance is that it is not a static state, but instead an evolving process for each of us. It requires continual adjustment and adaptation to our changing circumstances and priorities in life. Have you ever walked across a balance beam? Or maybe across a log over water? It requires a lot of focus to remain balanced as you’re making your way across those. In the same way it takes a lot of self awareness in life to find that balance as we learn to fine tune our actions, choices, and values.

There are a lot of areas in life that require balance. From our mental, physical, and emotional well being to our social well being. If we can find balance in these areas of life, I think we experience more peace and harmony in our lives, but also it ensures we are living a life that is sustainable. One thing I was talking to some friends about was this idea of bouncing back and forth between being very strict with myself – my exercise and eating habits, and how I spend my time – and being more lax and feeling weary trying to keep up with it all. I think the key is balance. We can’t be perfect 100% of the time. We will have off days, down days, or days we just aren’t as motivated and productive, and that’s okay. I’m learning to fight that tendency towards perfection and lean into what my gut and intuition are guiding me to do! I would love for you to join in this conversation! Let me know down in the comments your thoughts on my thoughts!

Here is the YouTube video I shared in conjunction with this blog post.

LEAVING SPACE FOR PROCESSING EMOTIONS

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Okay friends, for today’s Thoughtful Thursday post I wanted to talk about something that has been on my mind. There were several things that caused me to think about if  I am really leaving space in my life to process unresolved feelings, or am I still filling my life with other things as a distraction from processing and dealing with those feelings?

The first thing that spurred me on to think about if I am really dealing with my feelings is doing the Surrender Dip. If you missed it, last week I shared in my post (and in a DITL YouTube video) that I found this group on Instagram of people who get together once a week to jump in Barton Springs pool (which is a cold, spring fed pool in Austin) as a way to start the day off with positive energy! I decided to go again this week! The act of jumping in a cold pool has been a tangible way to let go of negative energy. But in addition to that it also just wakes you up. I don’t really know how to describe it. It shocks your nervous system in a good way. Also, this group provides a community of people who all are working to better themselves, which has led to some really deep and meaningful conversations. Some of these conversations have gotten me to really think about those areas of my life where I have some unresolved feelings.

The other thing that really got me to thinking about this idea of if I am really processing my feelings was a random YouTube video that I saw on my home page. As many of you know I am fascinated by minimalism, and trying to pursue a minimalist life in my own way. So this video where a YouTuber was sharing her extreme minimalist apartment tour with no furniture caught my eye. While I don’t think I could ever live as an extreme minimalist, I do find that lifestyle interesting and perhaps even a little bit enviable. As she walked us through every nook and cranny of her home – literally showing us everything she owned – I thought to myself how nice it would be to have so little to manage. Some of those feelings come from someone who has been a homemaker for many, many years and who is quite frankly tired of managing stuff!

Here is the YouTube video I watched if you’re interesting in check it out!

BUT, as I thought more about this idea of living with so little and having to manage so little I started thinking about what in the world I would do with all that extra time I would have. This made me realize that I do, to a certain extent, use my stuff or more specifically managing my stuff or working to keep me distracted. While I definitely have more margin in my life now than when my kids were younger, I find that I still am able to fill my time with work. I’m not exactly sure what to do with this information at this point. Do I look at my stuff with a more critical eye and declutter more? Do I lower my expectations of how often I clean and organize my stuff? Or are there other things in my life that I could cut back on in order to create that space that I need to process unresolved feelings?

It’s actually scary to think about opening that can of worms – allowing myself to really evaluate my feelings in certain areas that I have repressed over the years. But the first step is always awareness. I am aware that there are feelings that I have been masking or ignoring because it feels too hard. I was just talking to a friend this morning, and I realized that I have so much more self work to do! While I have grown a lot over the last five years of my life, I still have a lot more growth that needs to happen!

I don’t know what you are dealing with today. I don’t know what difficult thing you might be going through, but I hope this encouraged you today. Make space in your life to feel and process unresolved emotions! It is well worth it!

Here is the YouTube video I made in conjunction with this blog post.

VULNERABILITY & CREATING COMMUNITY

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Hey friends, for today’s Thoughtful Thursday post I wanted to debrief with you about a recent experience I had. I joined a group here in Austin and participated in something called a Surrender Dip. I also enlisted my friend Becca to come with me so I would feel less weird since I would at least know one person. I’ll start by summing it up with IT WAS AMAZING! I’m so glad I did this. Even if I just did it one time, it was so worth it. But I do plan to go back! So I found this group on Instagram. I guess the algorithm knew that I needed to find this group! The account on Instagram is Surrender Dip Austin and I recognized they were jumping into Barton Springs pool. So I reached out to the guy who heads up the group and asked him if this was open to anyone and if they did it regularly and he said yes! Anyone is welcome to come, and they do it every Tuesday morning! I honestly didn’t get much more information than that. I watched the Reels on Instagram and it looked like jumping into a cold pool was pretty much the extent to it. I assumed it also had some sort of community building aspect to it as well. (Scroll to the bottom to click on the YouTube video I made in conjunction with this post if you would like to see the jump!)

The first take away I had is how amazing it is to do things outside of my comfort zone! I really didn’t know what to expect and I’m so glad my friend Becca was willing to come with me because that made me feel a lot more at ease. I also had never met these people and I was hoping I would at least recognize the main guy! It’s always a little scary to just walk up to a stranger and introduce yourself, even though I told him that I would be coming. But this group of people was so kind and welcoming to me and my friend! After we jumped, we all just hung out in the pool and Becca and I were getting to know some of the people who participated. After we got out my friend and I got into a conversation with two of the guys. We seemed to quickly connect about some shared experiences we had, and when they shared some of their stories it made me feel safe to share some of my story. It reminded me of how valuable vulnerability is when developing friendships or community. I was also reminded that people cross our paths for a purpose. Some people may just be for a short time, and some people for a lifetime, but I don’t think it was just a coincidence that we encountered each other! All from an instagram post! 

The conversations we had were so meaningful and when it was winding down, the guy who formed this Surrender Dip group suggested we do a quick mediation – just to process the morning. So, the four of us lined up on the grass and sat in silence with our eyes closed. It was such a sweet moment. I mostly prayed for each of the people sitting there with me, but I also just became overwhelmed with gratitude for each of them. For old and new friends. For Becca for being there for me this morning, and for my new friends for listening to my story, and for being vulnerable enough to share parts of their stories. There are people in this world who I believe are just a light. Who love people so well – and I felt that from each of them that morning.

I’m so glad I didn’t  let my fear win when I thought I should go to this Surrender Dip group because immediately I thought about all of the reasons I didn’t want to go. Getting up early to drive downtown? Meeting strangers? Jumping in a cold pool? All of this sounded scary and hard. But just because things are scary and/or hard doesn’t mean they aren’t good! I wish I had the words to articulate how amazing this experience was. I will be on the lookout for the next time I can do something out of my comfort zone!

Here is the YouTube video I made in conjunction with this blog post.

THOUGHTS AFTER A TRIP TO PORTLAND

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I mentioned in a previous post that our son Luke just graduated from The University of Texas and will be moving to Portland, Oregon at the end of the summer for his first job out of college. We went to visit to help him find where he wanted to live before moving out there. We actually used to live in Portland prior to moving to Austin, so it was fun to go back and show him around! After that trip I was definitely pondering some things about life and I wanted to share those things with you for this Thoughtful Thursday post.

The most important things in life are not things at all. We work hard, we hustle, we keep up pace on that treadmill of life and for what? Physical stuff comes and goes in our lives. But in the end we lose it all. There is a Bible passage that addresses this idea: Matthew 6:19-21 “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20 But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21 For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” Of course we need stuff to live, but our focus should not be on stuff as it isn’t lasting. The memories we make with people and the experiences we have are what’s important.

Like I mentioned, our son Luke will be moving to Portland at the end of the summer. We have two other adult children, but they are currently living with us so this is the first child we are really launching fully into the “real world.” Of course there is part of me that is a little sad, but I am so excited for him. And this is what we do as parents – we prepare them to live on their own, to be productive members of society. But one thing you face as your children begin growing up and moving out is regret. Sometimes I think of all of the time I spent taking care of and managing stuff, leaving less time to spend with my kids. But I also look back and realize how much time and energy I was afforded to pour into and spend with them as a SAHM and I’m forever grateful for those opportunities! It can be easy to be hard on yourself and feel like maybe you didn’t do enough for them, but likely if you care enough to think about that – you were an amazing parent!

But, reflecting back reminds me that moving forward in life I would like to be intentional with how I spend my time, energy, and money. I know I have shared these ideas before in different capacities, but today I wanted to remind you that focusing on experiences and relationships has brought so much more fulfillment, joy, and excitement than any physical items! I’m so thankful I came across the idea of minimalism several years ago. I feel like this way of life has really changed my priorities and outlook. Decluttering and then being intentional with what comes into my home has afforded me the time and money to pursue other things that are far more meaningful!

Admittedly, it’s not always easy to prioritize experiences and relationships. It can feel so comfy sitting on the sofa, watching Netflix or scrolling on the phone, but it is so worth it to get out there and live life and enjoy experiences! One of the reasons my son was interested in the job in Portland was the quality of life there. He is an active person and loves outdoor activities and living in this city will definitely allow him to pursue those things! I know sometimes I may sound redundant on these Thoughtful Thursday posts, but if you’re anything like me you need the reminders! I hope this was encouraging to you!

Here is the video I created in conjunction with this post if you would like to see more of our trip to Portland, Oregon!

REFLECTIONS FROM A SOLO ROAD TRIP

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Hey friends, I just returned from a two week solo road trip through Arizona! It was a bit scary to do this trip, but it was so amazing and I definitely had thoughtful take aways that I wanted to share for today’s Thoughtful Thursday post! Part of why I drove through Arizona was to meet a few YouTube friends who I met online and have gotten to know online over the past few years. It was amazing to see them in person! If you want to see the YouTube video I created in conjunction with this post, I will have it linked at the end of this post!

The first thought I wanted to share with you today that I had during this trip is that nature speaks to me. I’ve always known I’m an outdoors type person and that I love nature, but this trip reminded me how important it is for me to experience nature daily for my soul. I can’t tell you how many times I teared up just taking in the nature around me. I had never been to Arizona, so it was all new to me. I honestly didn’t realize how beautiful Arizona would be. Tumamoc Hill in Tucson in particular really had me in awe! At the top I just enjoyed time up there. I took off my shoes to do some grounding and listened to worship music and I’m telling you this was feeding my soul!!!

Something else I decided to do while on this trip is to get my first tattoo! I thought I would share with you a little about that experience! At first I was a bit hesitant to go get a tattoo by myself, especially my first tattoo, but I decided it was apropos for this trip and because of the tattoo that I got. I got the word “enough” tattooed on my wrist so every time I’m feeling down on myself or like I need validation, I can look down and be reminded that I am enough. I am enough just as I am. I am enough on my own. I don’t need external validation to feel enough. So getting this tattoo on my own made sense! As far as getting the tattoo itself – honestly I didn’t think it hurt that bad. Granted this is a small tattoo. It felt more like buzzing, like an electric toothbrush or something. It was sore afterwards, but it healed quickly and nicely. There was a point where she had to stop for a few minutes. She told me to eat a good breakfast and hydrate. I was nervous so all I could do was drink a protein shake. I think I was using a lot of energy talking to her, because that’s what I do when I’m nervous. I started feeling a little light headed, so she stopped and ended up giving me a glucose tablet! I guess this is common since she was prepared! I’m so happy with the results and I have no regrets! I have wanted this tattoo for over 10 years, so this was not a spur of the moment decision. I thought for a long time about it, and honestly one of the reasons I had not gotten it was because of my people pleasing tendencies and I didn’t want to be judged for having a tattoo. But at this point in life I’m letting go of being a people pleaser! 

Something else I learned from this trip was to really problem solve on my own. I have been married since I was 21 years old and so I feel like I’ve always had that partner there to help me solve any problems. It was good to learn to just figure things out on my own! I definitely had a few snafus with getting into AirBnB’s, and issues with the AirBmB’s in general, but in the end I was always able to figure it out!

Along with problem solving, I learned to not allow my anxiety to drive my life. In those moments when things would go wrong, I would just take a deep breath and remind myself that I am an intelligent woman and I can figure things out! Being alone in general taught me to calm myself down when I felt that anxiety rising for any reason! So many people said to me things like they were worried for me traveling on my own or they could never do a trip like this. But I realized it just takes standing up to your anxiety! I truly think anyone COULD do this, but maybe they are just too afraid.

Another thing I learned on this trip is to be okay by myself. Enjoying my own thoughts and my own company. Sometimes this was a bit rough admittedly, like the one time I went to a restaurant by myself and sat and ate alone. I wasn’t a fan and can now cross this off my bucket list, but I’m glad I experienced it. I got my tattoo by myself, and visited the Grand Canyon for the first time ever and I went alone! Another thing that was really tough is the cabin I stayed at in Sedona didn’t have wifi! I actually didn’t realize this, live and learn – next time I will read the entire listing! But I really thought all AirBnB’s had wifi!! But it was good to be alone in the woods with my thoughts and it did force me to do some reading.

The last thing I took away from this trip that I wanted to share is the importance of doing the scary or hard thing in order to live life to the fullest! I really wanted to do another hike in Sedona before I left. I went on a hike with my friend Jacque and her husband and it definitely feels less scary hiking with others. It was outside of my comfort zone to do a solo hike because I am not directionally oriented. I can easily get lost. I carefully studied the map before I left and took notes to remember which directions I needed to go. I was so proud of myself for accomplishing this hike and I only asked for directions once!

I hope this post maybe inspired you to do something outside of your comfort zone! There were certainly moments that we scary, but overall I am so glad I took this trip! I highly recommend solo travel to anyone!

The YouTube video I created in conjunction with this blog post.

GET UNCOMFORTABLE

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Okay friends, for today’s Thoughtful Thursday post I wanted to talk about something I shared a little bit about in an Instagram Reel and a YouTube short earlier this week, but I wanted to take some time to elaborate on this topic. I shared how it is human nature to fight for what is comfortable. To fight for the path of least resistance. To fight for the familiar. But just because that feels natural, doesn’t mean that’s what’s best for us. Sometimes in the comfortable we become robotic. We stop being present. We stop engaging with our lives. What if the fulfilling life you want happens when you get uncomfortable?

You might have heard that it is common for people who were abused as children to gravitate towards those types of abusive relationships as an adult. I don’t think it’s because they are sadistic, I think it’s because as humans we tend to gravitate towards what we know, what feels normal, or what feels safe. This can be true even if that may be toxic. We must fight against the toxic narratives that were programmed into us.

It’s not easy to change behavior or thought patterns. A great analogy is likening our thought patterns to creating a pathway, like a roadway in our minds. When we keep traveling down the same path over and over – that route becomes like a highway. It is so much easier to travel on that highway than to take side roads or back ways. But as you work to change your thought patterns and go down the new way, the healthier way of thinking, THAT pathway over time becomes the predominant thought process instead.

We must be patient with ourselves. In order to stop fighting for what is familiar and do something different, it takes time and work. Retraining our minds is not easy and it doesn’t happen overnight. Most people don’t like to hear the truth that we grow and change slowly, organically over time. Especially in our fast paced culture where everything is a click away, we are impatient and want quick fixes. We must learn to submit to the fact that personal growth just doesn’t work that way. 

It’s not easy to be uncomfortable. It’s not easy to change and grow. There is a reason when children grow and have physical pain we call it “growing pains.” It hurts to grow, and no one likes pain. But that pain should remind you that you are making progress! When we workout our muscles get sore. That is a sign that our muscles are growing. They are sore because they were stretched and pushed to the limit, but the outcome is we are stronger!

As I look back over my life, I am reminded time and time again that when I have stepped out of my comfort zone and did something scary that has led to the most fulfilling experiences in my life! I know it’s hard to do something uncomfortable or scary, but it’s also hard living a passive life where you feel like you’re just on a treadmill going nowhere! You choose your hard!

Well friends, I hope what I shared with you today was encouraging or maybe challenged you! As always, I would love to hear your thoughts on my thoughts down in the comments!

Here is the YouTube video I shared in conjunction with this blog post!

INTENTIONAL LIVING, VALUING EXPERIENCES OVER THINGS

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Hey friends, for today’s Thoughtful Thursday post I wanted to talk about part of my life ethos with regard to intentional living. Part of choosing to live intentionally for me is valuing experiences over things. Some people may say that when you spend money on an experience, it is over after that experience is over, whereas with things you will have it for as long as you would like. But I would argue that experiences actually last you a lifetime. You will always have the memories you make. I think now more than ever it’s important to be intentional about spending time with family and friends, or even by yourself off of screens!

This year I am turning 50 years old. I was joking with some friends that some people celebrate their birthday week or even their birthday month, but Joy is going to celebrate her birthday year! I plan to do lots of traveling in 2024 as I am focusing on this principle of experiences over stuff!

We recently returned from a family ski vacation in the mountains. The mountains are for sure my happy place! I love skiing for lots of reasons, one being the peace I feel on top of a mountain and as I ski down. There is nothing like the sound of silence in the mountains. The mountains are a place that also moves me emotionally and spiritually. There were several times where I just started crying because of my awe of the beauty and majesty of the mountains. That feeling really can’t be replicated.

I also wanted to share a little story about some of the things that went wrong on our trip. This seems to be a theme for our ski trips! I shared a ski vlog a couple of years ago on my YouTube channel, which I can link below, and you can listen to the stories I told from the adventures of that ski trip! But I wanted to throw in here this idea that it’s okay when things go wrong or we endure hardships when we prioritize experiences. I’m learning that just goes along with the territory and it can teach us lessons as well!

So, it was snowing when we entered the resort. Our condo was at the top of a hill on a small road which had not been plowed. AND we don’t have four wheel drive… you can probably tell where this story is going. We tried getting up the hill from two different entrances AND we tried helping push the vehicle up the hill while my husband hit the gas, to no avail! So, we decided we would park in the parking lot of the resort and walk our stuff the 400 yards or so up the hill to the condo! I have never experienced altitude sickness, but I think between working hard carrying bags up a hill immediately upon entering the mountains, and also not really getting enough to eat or hydration for the day since we were driving all day, made me more susceptible to getting sick. That night, in the middle of the night I got a text from my son saying he felt really sick too. I was then wide awake, not feeling well myself but also worried about him. I tried to get up to go to the bathroom, but took two steps before I passed out. I called for my husband to help me and I was trying to stand up again and passed out again! I woke up to him standing over me asking if I was okay. I was like, no I can’t stay conscious haha! He helped me get back into bed, gave me electrolytes, and a trash can cuz I was feeling nauseous. Sorry for the TMI, I did end up throwing up, but felt better after that. I thought for sure I wouldn’t be  able to ski the next day but surprisingly I was able to rally! Unfortunately my son felt sick for most of the trip and was only able to ski one half day of the three we were skiing!

Also, the morning we were supposed to leave it was predicted to accumulate close to 11 inches of snow, so we tried to get out as quickly as possible! It was a little precarious, but we did in fact make it out of the resort and down the mountain and then home safely!

One other thing I wanted to share with regards to valuing experiences: look for opportunities to experience whimsy. I find that I basically turn into a five year old child who is enamored with whimsy when I’m in the snow! Maybe this is a result of living in a climate where I rarely get to see snow, but nevertheless, it reminds me of the importance of finding joy in the little things in life. Look for moments or opportunities to experience playfulness. Sometimes we need to just stop taking ourselves so seriously!

Here is the YouTube video I posted in conjunction with this blog post.

DO YOU WANT OPTIONS OR FREEDOM

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Okay friends, for today’s Thoughtful Thursday I wanted to talk about something that I have been thinking about with regards to minimalism. I have talked frequently about my quest to simplify my life. I’m sure many of you who have been around for a while know that I have spent several years decluttering our home. I’m finally getting to a point where I have reached maintenance mode.

One big lesson I have learned from this process is the idea that we have a choice between options or freedom. What I mean by this, is we can have a lot of options in any given personal possessions category, or we can have freedom from those items. Take clothing as an example. We can have a closet full of clothes, which offers us lots of options, but it comes at the expense of freedom – of time, choosing what to wear can be more difficult with more options, and it also takes more time to maintain a larger wardrobe.

You might have heard people talking about how paralyzing making decisions can be these days because of our options. The internet offers us so many options – from different types of jeans to purchase, to job opportunities, to dating partners. Having endless options can be overwhelming and take up a lot of mental capacity to sift through all of the information presented to us to make a decision on any given thing.

I have been thinking about how as we pursue minimalism, we must decide which categories are important for us personally to have options and which it’s important to have freedom. This will be different for each person since we all have different interests and passions. Maybe you don’t cook or bake much, so you can have far less kitchen and pantry inventory on hand – giving you more freedom to spend time on other things. There are some people who find that freedom is more important than options in most categories of possessions. But we must each decide what works best for us and for our families.

For me, I used to have lots of extra decor on hand. I loved decorating for each season and rotating out different decor, but as I age I’m realizing I would rather own a smaller collection of items I truly really love and rotate them less frequently. I choose the freedom of not switching out decor often and having that time to pursue other things.

Everything we own will cost us. It will of course cost us the initial monetary price, but then it will cost us time and energy to clean, maintain, organize, and store these items. It will also cost us the mental energy of one day perhaps deciding to declutter that item. 

I was especially thinking about this as I put away my Christmas decor this year. I realized it really was quite simple to put everything away because of how much I have pared down my holiday decor. And I have several transitional pieces that can stay up through the winter.

Stuff can own us, or we can own the stuff. I have learned that it is a balance trying to decide what’s important enough to have options and where I want freedom instead. The longer I pursue minimalism and simple living, the more I become drawn to freedom over options! Each of us must decide what works best for us, our lifestyles, and our families!

The YouTube video I shared in conjunction with this blog post.

LISTENING TO YOUR BODY

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Okay friends, for today’s Thoughtful Thursday post I wanted to encourage you to listen to your body. This is a time of year where it can be really easy to run ourselves ragged trying to get everything done for the holiday season, but we must listen to our bodies and eat when we need to eat, and sleep when we are feeling run down.

It’s inevitable that we will have more to do during the holiday season probably than any other time during the year. There are presents to buy, wrap, and potentially send. There are Christmas cards to send (if you’re still doing those!) There are parties to attend, kids’ holiday concerts or events, extra food to prepare, and of course decorating our homes! It can all be a bit overwhelming.

If you are finding year after year you feel overwhelmed and run down, perhaps evaluate all of the commitments you make this time of year. It is okay to say no or to scale back. I know that is not always easy for sure! But we need to create margin in our lives this time of year to have down time and time to take care of ourselves – either special self care type time or just time to get proper nutrition and rest!

Earlier on in our marriage we would get gifts for all of our siblings and the nieces and nephews. As we added more and more nieces and nephews we decided to do a gift exchange with the adults and buy for all of the kids. Then as the kids got older, we decided to do an exchange with all of them as well. Over time I realized that it seemed like we were essentially exchanging money as everyone would send wish lists with specific items – especially as the nieces and nephews got to be teenagers and a little more challenging to purchase for. I decided that it was silly for us to continue doing these exchanges because we live far from both sides of the family and do not get together for the holidays, so I not only had to purchase and wrap gifts but also stand in line at the post office to send them. It was so freeing to step away from those gift exchanges.

Next I decided to quit sending physical Christmas cards. This has been a relatively recent decision. I believe the last one I sent was in 2019. It was a big ordeal and I understand that I could have simplified it instead of quit all together. But we would get our family photo professionally taken in the fall, I would order the photo cards, write a family letter updating everyone on the happenings during that year, print those out then stuff envelopes. I am really thankful for the years we did it and I have kept those for us and for each of our kids to have for memories, but as my kids got older I felt like there was less to share in those letters. You could choose to quit sending physical cards all together, or you could just simplify the process.

Food preparation and decorating are other big commitments this time of year. Again, we can choose to scale back. Perhaps instead of making eight different types of Christmas cookies you could choose your favorite four. Perhaps you could go through your Christmas decor and declutter items that you don’t love, only keeping your favorite items that you love and are meaningful to you. Having a smaller collection of Christmas decor will simplify the decorating process making it less overwhelming.

Something else that I am still learning to do is to enlist help. If there are tasks you can delegate to your spouse or children, find ways they can help. It’s great to get the whole family involved in prepping for the holiday season! I admit that this is really not easy for me. I struggle in general to ask for help, but I recognize that sometimes it’s difficult or even more time consuming to delegate tasks – explaining what needs to get done.

I share all this with you to give you ideas or help you think of ways you can simplify or streamline responsibilities during the holiday season. This time of year can become so overwhelming and busy, but there are ways we can simplify so we have time to enjoy the season!

Here is the YouTube video I shared in conjunction with this blog post!