LEAVING SPACE FOR PROCESSING EMOTIONS

Okay friends, for today’s Thoughtful Thursday post I wanted to talk about something that has been on my mind. There were several things that caused me to think about if  I am really leaving space in my life to process unresolved feelings, or am I still filling my life with other things as a distraction from processing and dealing with those feelings?

The first thing that spurred me on to think about if I am really dealing with my feelings is doing the Surrender Dip. If you missed it, last week I shared in my post (and in a DITL YouTube video) that I found this group on Instagram of people who get together once a week to jump in Barton Springs pool (which is a cold, spring fed pool in Austin) as a way to start the day off with positive energy! I decided to go again this week! The act of jumping in a cold pool has been a tangible way to let go of negative energy. But in addition to that it also just wakes you up. I don’t really know how to describe it. It shocks your nervous system in a good way. Also, this group provides a community of people who all are working to better themselves, which has led to some really deep and meaningful conversations. Some of these conversations have gotten me to really think about those areas of my life where I have some unresolved feelings.

The other thing that really got me to thinking about this idea of if I am really processing my feelings was a random YouTube video that I saw on my home page. As many of you know I am fascinated by minimalism, and trying to pursue a minimalist life in my own way. So this video where a YouTuber was sharing her extreme minimalist apartment tour with no furniture caught my eye. While I don’t think I could ever live as an extreme minimalist, I do find that lifestyle interesting and perhaps even a little bit enviable. As she walked us through every nook and cranny of her home – literally showing us everything she owned – I thought to myself how nice it would be to have so little to manage. Some of those feelings come from someone who has been a homemaker for many, many years and who is quite frankly tired of managing stuff!

Here is the YouTube video I watched if you’re interesting in check it out!

BUT, as I thought more about this idea of living with so little and having to manage so little I started thinking about what in the world I would do with all that extra time I would have. This made me realize that I do, to a certain extent, use my stuff or more specifically managing my stuff or working to keep me distracted. While I definitely have more margin in my life now than when my kids were younger, I find that I still am able to fill my time with work. I’m not exactly sure what to do with this information at this point. Do I look at my stuff with a more critical eye and declutter more? Do I lower my expectations of how often I clean and organize my stuff? Or are there other things in my life that I could cut back on in order to create that space that I need to process unresolved feelings?

It’s actually scary to think about opening that can of worms – allowing myself to really evaluate my feelings in certain areas that I have repressed over the years. But the first step is always awareness. I am aware that there are feelings that I have been masking or ignoring because it feels too hard. I was just talking to a friend this morning, and I realized that I have so much more self work to do! While I have grown a lot over the last five years of my life, I still have a lot more growth that needs to happen!

I don’t know what you are dealing with today. I don’t know what difficult thing you might be going through, but I hope this encouraged you today. Make space in your life to feel and process unresolved emotions! It is well worth it!

Here is the YouTube video I made in conjunction with this blog post.

REFLECTIONS FROM A SOLO ROAD TRIP

Hey friends, I just returned from a two week solo road trip through Arizona! It was a bit scary to do this trip, but it was so amazing and I definitely had thoughtful take aways that I wanted to share for today’s Thoughtful Thursday post! Part of why I drove through Arizona was to meet a few YouTube friends who I met online and have gotten to know online over the past few years. It was amazing to see them in person! If you want to see the YouTube video I created in conjunction with this post, I will have it linked at the end of this post!

The first thought I wanted to share with you today that I had during this trip is that nature speaks to me. I’ve always known I’m an outdoors type person and that I love nature, but this trip reminded me how important it is for me to experience nature daily for my soul. I can’t tell you how many times I teared up just taking in the nature around me. I had never been to Arizona, so it was all new to me. I honestly didn’t realize how beautiful Arizona would be. Tumamoc Hill in Tucson in particular really had me in awe! At the top I just enjoyed time up there. I took off my shoes to do some grounding and listened to worship music and I’m telling you this was feeding my soul!!!

Something else I decided to do while on this trip is to get my first tattoo! I thought I would share with you a little about that experience! At first I was a bit hesitant to go get a tattoo by myself, especially my first tattoo, but I decided it was apropos for this trip and because of the tattoo that I got. I got the word “enough” tattooed on my wrist so every time I’m feeling down on myself or like I need validation, I can look down and be reminded that I am enough. I am enough just as I am. I am enough on my own. I don’t need external validation to feel enough. So getting this tattoo on my own made sense! As far as getting the tattoo itself – honestly I didn’t think it hurt that bad. Granted this is a small tattoo. It felt more like buzzing, like an electric toothbrush or something. It was sore afterwards, but it healed quickly and nicely. There was a point where she had to stop for a few minutes. She told me to eat a good breakfast and hydrate. I was nervous so all I could do was drink a protein shake. I think I was using a lot of energy talking to her, because that’s what I do when I’m nervous. I started feeling a little light headed, so she stopped and ended up giving me a glucose tablet! I guess this is common since she was prepared! I’m so happy with the results and I have no regrets! I have wanted this tattoo for over 10 years, so this was not a spur of the moment decision. I thought for a long time about it, and honestly one of the reasons I had not gotten it was because of my people pleasing tendencies and I didn’t want to be judged for having a tattoo. But at this point in life I’m letting go of being a people pleaser! 

Something else I learned from this trip was to really problem solve on my own. I have been married since I was 21 years old and so I feel like I’ve always had that partner there to help me solve any problems. It was good to learn to just figure things out on my own! I definitely had a few snafus with getting into AirBnB’s, and issues with the AirBmB’s in general, but in the end I was always able to figure it out!

Along with problem solving, I learned to not allow my anxiety to drive my life. In those moments when things would go wrong, I would just take a deep breath and remind myself that I am an intelligent woman and I can figure things out! Being alone in general taught me to calm myself down when I felt that anxiety rising for any reason! So many people said to me things like they were worried for me traveling on my own or they could never do a trip like this. But I realized it just takes standing up to your anxiety! I truly think anyone COULD do this, but maybe they are just too afraid.

Another thing I learned on this trip is to be okay by myself. Enjoying my own thoughts and my own company. Sometimes this was a bit rough admittedly, like the one time I went to a restaurant by myself and sat and ate alone. I wasn’t a fan and can now cross this off my bucket list, but I’m glad I experienced it. I got my tattoo by myself, and visited the Grand Canyon for the first time ever and I went alone! Another thing that was really tough is the cabin I stayed at in Sedona didn’t have wifi! I actually didn’t realize this, live and learn – next time I will read the entire listing! But I really thought all AirBnB’s had wifi!! But it was good to be alone in the woods with my thoughts and it did force me to do some reading.

The last thing I took away from this trip that I wanted to share is the importance of doing the scary or hard thing in order to live life to the fullest! I really wanted to do another hike in Sedona before I left. I went on a hike with my friend Jacque and her husband and it definitely feels less scary hiking with others. It was outside of my comfort zone to do a solo hike because I am not directionally oriented. I can easily get lost. I carefully studied the map before I left and took notes to remember which directions I needed to go. I was so proud of myself for accomplishing this hike and I only asked for directions once!

I hope this post maybe inspired you to do something outside of your comfort zone! There were certainly moments that we scary, but overall I am so glad I took this trip! I highly recommend solo travel to anyone!

The YouTube video I created in conjunction with this blog post.

MINDSET SHIFT ON REGRET

Okay friends, for today’s Thoughtful Thursday post I wanted to talk about regret. We all to a certain degree have regrets in life. I am someone who truly tries to not live with regret. If I have those thoughts of regret pop up, I remind myself of a principle I believe in: that things happen for a reason. As you age, it gets easier to see the big picture of life. You may question why you made the decisions you made that you regret, or worse yet why things have happened to you because of chance or other people’s choices. But I truly think there is a big picture story happening in our lives that is hard to understand.

Another thing I do when I have feelings of regret is shift my mindset around it because regret can be a great learning experience for us. If we evaluate the regretful decisions we made, they can inform decisions we make moving into our future. Unfortunately time machines have not been invented, so we are not able to go back and make different choices. All we can do is make better choices moving forward. When we embrace this mindset shift, we can learn to forgive ourselves for past mistakes, and to give ourselves grace for not being perfect. It can be hard to forgive ourselves, but it’s necessary so we can move forward in life and view these regrets as lessons instead of dwelling on them.

Oftentimes with regret, it FEELS regretful because it is pricking some value we have and that decision didn’t align with that life value. I believe we will live more fulfilling lives when we make decisions that are truly in line with what we say we value. Sometimes we just give lip service to certain values, but our behavior and choices don’t reflect that value. So, if you have a regret, really evaluate why you feel regretful and what value it’s pricking. What can you do today in the present, and moving forward to better align with those values?

Regrets can be a great teacher to us, but also those decisions you made, while they may have been wrong they are leading you towards something better. Sometimes I can sit and think about the butterfly effect and it can really boggle my mind! I’m sure many of you know what this concept is, but basically it is the idea that the world is deeply interconnected and one small occurrence can affect a much larger complex system. This term was originally coined by meteorologist and mathematician, Edward Lorenz in the 1960s. In his scientific findings, he learned that weather predictions are often not accurate because of this idea. He suggested that the flapping of a butterfly’s wings represented the tiny change in the atmospheric condition that could change the trajectory of the weather. In the same way, some small change or different decision in our lives could cause a totally different outcome.

Hopefully I’m not getting too far off track here, basically I bring up this idea of the butterfly effect to demonstrate that perhaps we all have a path that was supposed to happen, so we should not live with those regrets. This idea reminds me of that Jim Carrey movie, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. Have you ever seen that movie? It’s an older movie, but it is so good! There are a lot of psychological ideas around relationships explored in this movie, but one is this idea of what is meant to happen will happen in the end. The basic premise of this sci-fi type movie is a couple faces struggles and they decide to go through this procedure of erasing their minds in order to deal with the pain of the relationship so they will forget about one another. But somehow they keep returning to each other and falling in love all over again.

I hope this chat today encouraged you to look at regret differently. Please let me know your thoughts in the comments! What are your thoughts on regret?

Here is the YouTube video I shared in conjunction with this post!

51% SURE

Okay friends, for today’s Thoughtful Thursday post I wanted to talk about something that has been on my mind lately. I have shared recently how I have been struggling a bit lately. Some of that has been trying to figure out what exactly I’m doing with my life. I have really enjoyed sharing creative content on my YouTube channel the last four years, but I’ll be honest, I have been feeling a bit burnt out with it lately and struggling to know what to share as I have been feeling like I have exhausted a lot of the ideas I had when I started my channel. I had a lot of spaces in my home that I was working on getting decluttered and organized and I shared that process throughout the years on my channel, but now I have gotten to maintenance mode, which affords me more time and margin in my life. I’m trying to figure out what exactly I want to do with that time. 

As someone who overthinks things, and struggles to make decisions, I am struggling to know what to do moving forward. I still really enjoy creating content and I would like to continue to share in some capacity on my YouTube channel, and other media platforms, but I am pondering other ideas I would like to pursue in life. And I wanted to share with you an inspiring principle I learned about on a podcast I recently listened to where Mel Robbins was interviewing Steven Bartlett, who is a British entrepreneur and podcaster. He talked about this idea of taking risks when making decisions. He explained that so many people want 100% (or near 100%) certainty that the decision they are making is the right decision. He suggested that we really only need to be 51% sure about something to go for it. He said oftentimes when we make these decisions we need to recognize that most of the time they are reversible so we might as well try! This perspective really inspired me! Because I overthink things, I am definitely the type of person who wants more certainty than just 51%, but if we don’t take risks we likely won’t be successful! Taking more risks leads to more likelihood of success, which makes sense just from a statistics standpoint!

One thing that can be challenging when we want to pursue something new or change direction in life is motivation. It is much easier, and more comfortable to continue doing what we are doing. We can end up on autopilot, which is beneficial in some ways. It requires less decisions and is predictable. On the other hand, autopilot causes us to kind of float through life and may prevent us from being intentional. Living on autopilot doesn’t allow room for growth. We grow outside of our comfort zone. But, back to this idea of needing motivation to grow and change and get outside of our comfort zone… Maybe instead of doing some big thing to make a change, we start with something small. We can’t make a change until we take a step towards change, and that step can be a small one.

Today I was listening to another podcast by Mel Robbins, obviously I’m a big fan of hers so I highly recommend checking out her YouTube channel. I linked that interview with Steven Bartlett above. In the podcast today she was talking about this very idea of the importance of just getting started. She was sharing this analogy of how when you put tulips in a vase, they will begin to bend to the direction of the sunlight. She suggested we need to “bend towards the light” – bend towards whatever change we are trying to make in life. If we just stay where we are, we will not grow or thrive!

I hope this post encouraged or inspired you in some way today! Leave me a comment and let me know your thoughts!

Here is the YouTube video I shared in conjunction with this blog post.

GET UNCOMFORTABLE

Okay friends, for today’s Thoughtful Thursday post I wanted to talk about something I shared a little bit about in an Instagram Reel and a YouTube short earlier this week, but I wanted to take some time to elaborate on this topic. I shared how it is human nature to fight for what is comfortable. To fight for the path of least resistance. To fight for the familiar. But just because that feels natural, doesn’t mean that’s what’s best for us. Sometimes in the comfortable we become robotic. We stop being present. We stop engaging with our lives. What if the fulfilling life you want happens when you get uncomfortable?

You might have heard that it is common for people who were abused as children to gravitate towards those types of abusive relationships as an adult. I don’t think it’s because they are sadistic, I think it’s because as humans we tend to gravitate towards what we know, what feels normal, or what feels safe. This can be true even if that may be toxic. We must fight against the toxic narratives that were programmed into us.

It’s not easy to change behavior or thought patterns. A great analogy is likening our thought patterns to creating a pathway, like a roadway in our minds. When we keep traveling down the same path over and over – that route becomes like a highway. It is so much easier to travel on that highway than to take side roads or back ways. But as you work to change your thought patterns and go down the new way, the healthier way of thinking, THAT pathway over time becomes the predominant thought process instead.

We must be patient with ourselves. In order to stop fighting for what is familiar and do something different, it takes time and work. Retraining our minds is not easy and it doesn’t happen overnight. Most people don’t like to hear the truth that we grow and change slowly, organically over time. Especially in our fast paced culture where everything is a click away, we are impatient and want quick fixes. We must learn to submit to the fact that personal growth just doesn’t work that way. 

It’s not easy to be uncomfortable. It’s not easy to change and grow. There is a reason when children grow and have physical pain we call it “growing pains.” It hurts to grow, and no one likes pain. But that pain should remind you that you are making progress! When we workout our muscles get sore. That is a sign that our muscles are growing. They are sore because they were stretched and pushed to the limit, but the outcome is we are stronger!

As I look back over my life, I am reminded time and time again that when I have stepped out of my comfort zone and did something scary that has led to the most fulfilling experiences in my life! I know it’s hard to do something uncomfortable or scary, but it’s also hard living a passive life where you feel like you’re just on a treadmill going nowhere! You choose your hard!

Well friends, I hope what I shared with you today was encouraging or maybe challenged you! As always, I would love to hear your thoughts on my thoughts down in the comments!

Here is the YouTube video I shared in conjunction with this blog post!

INTENTIONAL LIVING, VALUING EXPERIENCES OVER THINGS

Hey friends, for today’s Thoughtful Thursday post I wanted to talk about part of my life ethos with regard to intentional living. Part of choosing to live intentionally for me is valuing experiences over things. Some people may say that when you spend money on an experience, it is over after that experience is over, whereas with things you will have it for as long as you would like. But I would argue that experiences actually last you a lifetime. You will always have the memories you make. I think now more than ever it’s important to be intentional about spending time with family and friends, or even by yourself off of screens!

This year I am turning 50 years old. I was joking with some friends that some people celebrate their birthday week or even their birthday month, but Joy is going to celebrate her birthday year! I plan to do lots of traveling in 2024 as I am focusing on this principle of experiences over stuff!

We recently returned from a family ski vacation in the mountains. The mountains are for sure my happy place! I love skiing for lots of reasons, one being the peace I feel on top of a mountain and as I ski down. There is nothing like the sound of silence in the mountains. The mountains are a place that also moves me emotionally and spiritually. There were several times where I just started crying because of my awe of the beauty and majesty of the mountains. That feeling really can’t be replicated.

I also wanted to share a little story about some of the things that went wrong on our trip. This seems to be a theme for our ski trips! I shared a ski vlog a couple of years ago on my YouTube channel, which I can link below, and you can listen to the stories I told from the adventures of that ski trip! But I wanted to throw in here this idea that it’s okay when things go wrong or we endure hardships when we prioritize experiences. I’m learning that just goes along with the territory and it can teach us lessons as well!

So, it was snowing when we entered the resort. Our condo was at the top of a hill on a small road which had not been plowed. AND we don’t have four wheel drive… you can probably tell where this story is going. We tried getting up the hill from two different entrances AND we tried helping push the vehicle up the hill while my husband hit the gas, to no avail! So, we decided we would park in the parking lot of the resort and walk our stuff the 400 yards or so up the hill to the condo! I have never experienced altitude sickness, but I think between working hard carrying bags up a hill immediately upon entering the mountains, and also not really getting enough to eat or hydration for the day since we were driving all day, made me more susceptible to getting sick. That night, in the middle of the night I got a text from my son saying he felt really sick too. I was then wide awake, not feeling well myself but also worried about him. I tried to get up to go to the bathroom, but took two steps before I passed out. I called for my husband to help me and I was trying to stand up again and passed out again! I woke up to him standing over me asking if I was okay. I was like, no I can’t stay conscious haha! He helped me get back into bed, gave me electrolytes, and a trash can cuz I was feeling nauseous. Sorry for the TMI, I did end up throwing up, but felt better after that. I thought for sure I wouldn’t be  able to ski the next day but surprisingly I was able to rally! Unfortunately my son felt sick for most of the trip and was only able to ski one half day of the three we were skiing!

Also, the morning we were supposed to leave it was predicted to accumulate close to 11 inches of snow, so we tried to get out as quickly as possible! It was a little precarious, but we did in fact make it out of the resort and down the mountain and then home safely!

One other thing I wanted to share with regards to valuing experiences: look for opportunities to experience whimsy. I find that I basically turn into a five year old child who is enamored with whimsy when I’m in the snow! Maybe this is a result of living in a climate where I rarely get to see snow, but nevertheless, it reminds me of the importance of finding joy in the little things in life. Look for moments or opportunities to experience playfulness. Sometimes we need to just stop taking ourselves so seriously!

Here is the YouTube video I posted in conjunction with this blog post.

GRACE IN HOMEMAKING

Okay friends, for today’s Thoughtful Thursday post I wanted to address something that some of my girlfriends and I were talking about this week. We were talking about this idea that there are different seasons in life that allow for different abilities and different bandwidth for homemaking.

I wonder if some people come to my YouTube channel and see my organized spaces, see my tidy home, hear me talking about my disciplined homemaking schedule and think to themselves: I don’t have the bandwidth for that. Guess what, I have not always had the bandwidth for the way I live now! We are all in different seasons of life, have different responsibilities and obligations, and we all have different abilities. Some of you may have a chronic illness, or depression, or other health conditions that limit what you can do in this season in life. You may have young children with busy schedules, or you have other priorities and commitments outside of your home – whether that is a job or an organization you’re involved in. I just want to let you know, if you visit my YouTube channel, you are seeing one stage in my life. You are seeing the stage of life where I have more margin in my life. My kids are older now and more independent, and in addition to that, ever since Covid I have not been involved in as many things I once used to be involved in. I have enjoyed this slower pace of life, and so have been more intentional with my schedule and what commitments I will make moving forward.

Check out my YouTube channel if you have not already!

Thirteen years ago I went through some health issues that affected my ability to be productive. I had pretty severe anxiety and debilitating acid reflux for quite a while before I learned about my food sensitivities and some of my hormonal imbalances. During that time in life, which was also when my kids were in middle and elementary school, and my husband traveled a lot for his job often leaving me essentially to be a single parent, I had to evaluate realistically what I could do. It’s in these more difficult seasons of life that we must give ourselves grace with regards to homemaking. Sometimes just keeping people alive is enough!

While I have always had a schedule, even when my kids were very young, I have also allowed myself flexibility based on what commitments we had in each stage of life. While I have always incorporated deep cleaning and decluttering in my schedule, it certainly didn’t happen as regularly as it does now. There were some weeks when my kids were younger that I just didn’t have the bandwidth to get it done. In those seasons I had to prioritize other things – like my kids activities, volunteering, and other obligations outside of the home. 

If you have watched my channel over it’s lifetime (which by the way I officially had my four year YouTube anniversary on November 1st!), you will have seen the transformation of my home. While I did my best to keep our home clean, organized, and tidy while my kids were growing up, that wasn’t my priority then. But since starting my channel 4 years ago, with my kids older and more independent, I have done a lot of organizing projects and a lot of decluttering, which I only now have had the time to be intentional about. It took us 27 years of marriage to accumulate all of the things we have today, and it has taken me the last 8 years or so of prioritizing decluttering and organizing to get my home to where it is today. I organized and decluttered our spaces little by little over time, it didn’t happen overnight.

I did want to share this with you to let you know that anything I share on my YouTube channel or my blog comes from a place of where I am in my season of life. I share with you tips and things that have helped me as I get my home decluttered and organized, but I fully understand that not everyone is in a season where they have time to devote to these things. This is why I am such a big advocate for doing things a little at a time, and being intentional about what comes into your home! 

I hope if you are in a season where you don’t have as much bandwidth for homemaking, that you would give yourself grace today. I truly hope anything I share is inspirational to you and doesn’t make you feel discouraged because you can’t do things the way I do them. I only share to inspire and motivate! If you are in a more difficult season, where you don’t have as much time or energy – just be encouraged that seasons change! They always do!

Check out the YouTube video that I shared in conjunction with this blog post!

POSITIVE MINDSET

Okay friends, for today’s Thoughtful Thursday post I wanted to talk about having a positive mindset. I know that I often talk about positive self talk as a technique to keep a positive mindset. But I realized that when I share that I may make it sound like it’s a simple solution for negative thoughts or beliefs. I wanted to talk today about how I recognize this is absolutely not an easy thing to do.

Like any other healthy habit, positive self talk takes practice and repetition. I sometimes liken it to exercising. It’s not easy, but a necessary part of staying healthy. There are some days when I don’t want to workout, and the same is true for positive self talk. There may be days where I am struggling more to have a positive mindset, but I discipline myself to speak the positive, just like I discipline myself to do a workout on days when I’m feeling tired or just not in the mood to exercise.

The first thing we must do to get to a positive mindset is to be aware of our self-talk. Many of us talk to ourselves all day long unconsciously, not even really thinking about what kinds of things we are telling ourselves. Once we start becoming aware of those times when we are talking negatively or putting ourselves down, then we can start replacing those things with positive things. For a general example: if you recognize that you say to yourself, “I’m not good enough.” When you hear this, negate it by saying something like, “I am trying my best everyday.” Like I said, I acknowledge that this is not an easy practice. Anything we do that is pushing against what we naturally want to do is hard, it’s work. But I think it is worth it to do the work to get to a place where you have a positive self image and feel good about who you are.

Now I’m not suggesting you say something that is completely untrue about yourself with positive self talk. I’m just encouraging you to focus on the good in you, your character, and your talents. If we have a habit of focusing on the negative about ourselves, that is what I am suggesting to break. We still need to be accurate. It’s about creating new pathways in our mind so that we are in the habit of speaking positive to ourselves instead of negative.

I know some days can be really tough – for whatever reason. Maybe it’s a life circumstance, or maybe it’s just hormonal, but there are days that we may feel more down on ourselves than other days. I encourage you to reach out to a family member or friend who might encourage you through those moments. When we can’t speak kindly to ourselves, we may need to rely on others to remind us of the positive. 

I hope you have someone in your life who would speak positively to you, but if not there are a lot of positive affirmation videos on YouTube that could also help you! I actually like to make it a practice to listen to positive affirmations videos either before bed at night or first thing in the morning before getting out of bed. I have found this helpful for me to just maintain that positive frame of mind!

When you’re going through something really tough in life keeping a positive mindset can be extra challenging, so I don’t want to minimize whatever you might be going through that has caused you to struggle with a positive mindset. Like I said at the beginning of this chat, it’s not always easy. I have found that working hard to keep a positive mindset IN SPITE of difficult circumstances has truly helped me during those dark days! 

From my experience, overall I feel like once you experience that mindset shift, it is easier to continue on in it. It is like any other disciplined habit, the more you do it, the easier it becomes. And like I mentioned, you will still have those days that are a little more tough, but once it’s a habit it’s easier to bounce back!

THE REAL YOU

Okay friends, for today’s Thoughtful Thursday post I wanted to talk about being authentic. I heard this message this morning from a Christian teacher, Christine Caine. I really love her messages, they are so inspirational! I will link her YouTube channel here if you want to check that out. She said something that really resonated with me. She said, “The real you is who you are when no one is looking.” This resonated with me because when she said that I thought to myself, I truly want to strive to be authentically myself in every situation in life.

Being authentically myself does not necessarily mean oversharing. I really value boundaries on social media and online. It can be a tricky line to walk, because you do want to be relatable, but I believe that it is okay and actually healthy to keep some things about your life private. I think this is especially true when it comes to relationships in your life. I just don’t think it’s fair to share things that are not your story to tell. And oftentimes in those situations, you hear one side of the story, which is also not fair to the other people involved.

What I am talking about, and what I thought of when Christine said that, was that I would be consistent in whatever situation I’m in. That my values would guide my behavior, my words, and the way I treat people. Now with that said, most people are multifaceted! They have many facets to their personalities, so we are not just one way all of the time. I just say this because I recognize in different situations, different parts of our personalities may be more obvious. It doesn’t mean we are being inauthentic, it just means that in that situation that aspect of our personality is showing more. 

Christine shared this analogy of building a building. There is so much that goes on behind the scenes when you’re building a building, or I thought about when I’m doing a makeover on a room. There is a lot that has to happen before we get to the part where we get to decorate and do the finishing touches. So often on social media, people just see the finishing touches. They have no clue what is going on behind the scenes or what went on behind the scenes. Like I said, not that we have to share everything that is going on in our lives on social media, but all too often people just portray this external façade, that just isn’t real.

Listening to her just got me thinking, how can I truly be authentic while also having those boundaries? How can I be vulnerable and relatable while also honoring the privacy of others? I hope I share openly enough online that others can see my authenticity. Also, while I do like to be relatable, creating YouTube videos, Instagram posts, and blog posts are a creative outlet for me, so I am going to present them in an artistic way. Something else I have thought about is that some people might think: it’s unrealistic for someone to clean their house dressed nicely with makeup on and their hair done. Perhaps, but this is how I have always cleaned, even before I had a YouTube channel. And then there are some days where I don’t get dressed and stay in my workout clothes all day, and if you have watched my videos for any length of time you have seen that too! That is authentically me, and that is how I have always been!

Here in my Thoughtful Thursday posts I like to share positive and encouraging things. Things that will inspire you, or motivate you. And that is how I am in my real life as well, with my family and with my friends! I may have some down days, or rough days where I don’t feel as positive, but for the most part I am a positive person!

I hope I come across to you as authentic. Today, I’m evaluating the way I portray myself to others, and thinking about if there is any way I can be more authentic! Well friends, as always, I love to hear your thoughts on my thoughts down in the comments. Please let me know what you think about this idea of being authentic and “the real you is who you are when no one is looking.”

Here is the YouTube video I shared in conjunction with this blog post!

CHANGING SEASONS

Okay friends, for today’s Thoughtful Thursday post I wanted to encourage you, if you are in a difficult season in life, it is only a season. I have been thinking about seasons as we are finally changing seasons here in Austin! We are finally having some fall weather where the mornings have cooler, crisper air. When people talk about challenging times in life they often refer to an analogy that the winter was long and hard, but the spring is coming. For those of us in Texas, an analogy that resonates more is the summer was long and hard, but fall is coming! By late September, I am SO tired of the hot weather and I’m just longing for the crisp, cool mornings of TRUE fall!

Sometimes when we are walking through a difficult season in life it can feel so long and like it will never end. Somewhat like summer feels if you live in the southern states! Just like it’s hard to imagine the weather being cooler at the end of summer, in hard seasons of life it’s hard to imagine that things will feel positive and hopeful. I want to assure you, no matter how long you have been walking through a tough season, there is hope on the other side. You will one day feel the crispness of fall! 

I myself have been walking through a pretty tough season that has lasted quite a long time. I am just now seeing glimpses of hope that remind me that we will not forever be in a difficult season. There is hope for a change that is coming! I know more than anyone the perseverance it takes to live in a season that is challenging, so I can assure you that you can make it out on the other side!

While it can feel refreshing to exit a season of hardship, change is really never easy. At least for most people! Even when things are changing for the good, it can be scary to deal with the unknowns. Being aware and realistic with ourselves as we head into that new season can really help with this transition. While I was so excited for the cooler weather to return to Austin, I realized I had to change my schedule and go for a run a little later in the mornings now because it was not as comfortable first thing in the morning. It made me realize that we do need to be aware that change, even if it’s good, is not always easy.

Leaving a difficult season of life can bring so much opportunity for personal growth, finding purpose in life, and embracing a new perspective from what you learned in the season of darkness. So often it is in the difficult seasons of life that we actually grow the most – learning empathy and compassion, becoming more strong and resilient, and becoming more self assured. Also, in a season of hardship we may learn the value of self reflection as we process the difficulties we have endured and the value of acceptance as we may have had to learn to accept the way things are for that period of time. We must take these lessons with us as we move into a brighter and more hopeful season! This can be a great time to reevaluate your life because of the new outlook and potential new opportunities!

Well friends, I hope this Thoughtful Thursday was inspiring or encouraging to you today. As always, I love to hear your thoughts on my thoughts! I hope you might share your thoughts on this topic of changing seasons down in the comments!

Here is the YouTube video I shared in conjunction with this blog post!