Okay friends, for today’s Thoughtful Thursday I wanted to share a quote that my friend Jo shared with me. Jo also has a YouTube channel, Minimal Zebra! This quote is from Mother Theresa and it says, 

“People are often unreasonable and self-centered. Forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives. Be kind anyway. If you are honest, people may cheat you, be honest anyway. If you find happiness, people may be jealous. Be happy anyway. The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good. Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough. Give your best anyway. For you see, in the end, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.”

It can be challenging to deal with people who are unreasonable and self-centered. Oftentimes this behavior is a result of internal struggles the person is going through. When we recognize that people who are unreasonable and self-centered are likely going through or have gone through really difficult things, it can make it easier to have compassion on them and forgive them.

One thing I have learned from having a presence on social media, well and really just in life in general, is that people may misunderstand you. This is something that is really difficult for me as a people pleaser. But I am learning to realize that all that really matters is what is in your heart. People will interpret your actions and words however they want, but they don’t know what is in your heart. All we can do is focus on being the best we can be – a kind, caring, compassionate, and loving person. Also recognizing that we will make mistakes and we won’t always be perfectly kind, caring, compassionate or loving. But all we can do is our best. I’m learning to focus on the internal more than the external, because behavior, if even seemingly good on the outside, doesn’t always reveal true heart motives.

People often misunderstand you when they don’t know you well. Either acquaintances in your real life, or people seeing your content online. They don’t know what your life is really like. They don’t know what you endure day in and day out, especially if you are going through things that you don’t share openly about on social media. You know your heart and your motives, so if those are right you have nothing to worry about!

Ultimately we are only responsible for ourselves. Our behavior, our motives, our thoughts. We can’t control what others do, say, or think. In my opinion, it is better to live in such a way that we do the best we can do each day. “Give the world the best we have” as Mother Theresa says. It might not be “enough” by the world’s standards, but when you know you gave it your all, then you can sleep well at night. When you live with integrity, you have nothing to be ashamed of and nothing to hide. And when you do make a mistake and don’t live in such a way that you are proud of, then you make a different choice tomorrow!

As someone who is a people pleaser, or like I like to call myself a recovering people pleaser,  it can be easy to get wrapped up in trying to convince people you are a good person. I’m realizing this is a complete waste of energy. We must put our energy into BEING a good person and let the chips fall where they may so to speak. As Mother Theresa so wisely pointed out: “it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.”

It is not always easy to do, but focusing on your own life, your own happiness, and your own goals without worrying about others’ opinion of you is the healthiest way to live!